


i ashaya du

by pacificnewt



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, spock speaks some vulcan, they love each other a lot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-26
Updated: 2019-05-26
Packaged: 2020-03-19 22:15:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18979417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pacificnewt/pseuds/pacificnewt
Summary: in which bones has a rough day and spock is there to comfort him through it.





	i ashaya du

**Author's Note:**

> more soft spones !! translations for vulcan terms can be found at the end ♡

“Leonard?” The knock on the door was gentle. The noise from within quieted.

 

“What?” The voice that called back was raspy.

 

“Are you alright?”

 

A sniffle. “I’m fine.”

 

Spock pushed the door open slowly and peered inside Leonard’s room. By aid of the hallway light he could see Leonard’s silhouette perched at the edge of his bed, face buried deep in his hands. The air was thick with an alcoholic aroma.

 

Spock pushed the door closed behind him and the light from the hallway vanished. The room fell dark once more and Leonard turned his head.

 

“Spock, really, I’m fine–“

 

“Tell me what is wrong,” Spock returned softly. He stood awkwardly a few moments before he approached the bed and sat himself down on it. Leonard shifted uncomfortably and averted his eyes again. “I am here.”

 

“It’s fine, it’s… nothing.” Leonard sniffed again, hard, and wiped his eyes on the sleeve of his Starfleet uniform. “Rough day.”

 

Spock tilted his head and gingerly touched his fingers to the doctor’s bicep. “Would you like to talk about it?”

 

Leonard flinched. He lifted his glass to his mouth, took a long drink of God-knows-what, and inhaled sharply. “No. Don’t worry about it.”

 

“Leonard,” Spock began, his voice now a whisper. “Please do not hide your emotions from me.”

 

“I appreciate you trying to help, I really do, but I think I just need to be alone.” He frowned as soon as the words left his mouth.

 

“Is that the truth?”

 

Leonard sat in silence. He took another drink. “No.”

 

Spock sighed gently and took the glass from Leonard. He leaned over, placed it on the bedside table, and wrapped his thin arms around Leonard’s waist. He started to lay down and gently tugged his partner down with him. Spock adjusted their position, and as soon as Leonard’s head hit the pillow, he began to cry again.

 

“Oh, _ashal-veh,_ ” Spock whispered. He used one hand to carefully card his fingers through Leonard’s hair, and the other to wipe away the tears that started fo flow from his eyes. He drew him closer to his chest and shut his eyes.

 

“I hate my fucking job,” Leonard said bitterly. That wasn’t true, but sometimes it felt true. “I hate it.”

 

“What happened today?”

 

Leonard wanted to be angry with everything; and he was, just not with Spock. He wanted to hate him and be repulsed by his touch and he wished he couldn’t stand the sound of his voice. If anything he hated himself for finding comfort in his voice and being soothed by the way his thin fingers caressed him. He especially was calmed by Spock’s mother tongue. “I’m angry.”

 

“Why are you angry, _t’hy’la_?”

 

“We lost someone.” Leonard’s voice shook dangerously with the threat of breaking down with a sob. He clutched the fabric of Spock’s uniform and cried softly. “It was my fault. Failed surgery. I tried, Spock, I tried to save him, the injuries could have been healed, I could have done more, I–“

 

“Shh.” Spock’s hands moved to rub Leonard’s back. “This is not your fault, _ashal-veh_. You cannot save everyone.”

 

“I could have saved him,” he whimpered. “I could have. I almost did. We were so close, and he started slipping and I couldn’t catch him. Dammit!”

 

Spock kept wiping Leonard’s tears and touched their foreheads together. Leonard whimpered and sobbed as softly as he could manage with his chest constricted with emotion. He felt his heart beating fast and his ribcage tight against his skin. He leaned into Spock to savor his comfort, to not feel as alone as he had been. “Gentle, _ashayam_ ,” Spock cooed. “The only person blaming you for this is yourself. This is not your fault.”

 

“It is, it is,” Leonard cried. “I killed him, Spock.”

 

Spock cradled Leonard’s head and ran his fingers through his hair with care. He pressed fluttery kisses to the doctor’s forehead, his wet cheeks, and his puffy eyes. “Think of how many people you have saved, Doctor. You are not a bad man. You did everything that you could, though man cannot sway nature from its course. To think otherwise is simply… illogical.” Spock took Leonard’s hand with no hesitance and guided them into a Vulcan kiss. Leonard sniffed and held his hand against Spock’s, head falling against the Vulcan’s chest.

 

“ _I ashaya du_ ,” Spock murmured with more mouth kisses to Leonard’s head. “Please, do not allow this to break you. You will save somebody tomorrow. You will save people in the days that follow. You will save many more than not.”

 

“Yeah,” the doctor said weakly. “Okay. It’s okay.”

 

“Mm,” Spock hummed. “Would you like me to stay the night?”

 

“Please,” Leonard whispered. His voice was raw, vulnerable. “Don’t go.”

 

“I am here, _tal-kam_.” A gentle smile pulled Spock’s lips upward. “You are safe.”

 

“Thanks,” Leonard grumbled, closing his eyes and pulling himself closer to Spock.

 

“ _Taluhk nash-veh k’dular_ ,” Spock consoled.

 

“Yeah, yeah, you too.”

**Author's Note:**

> ashal-veh = darling  
> t’hy’la = friend/soulmate/brother/lover  
> ashayam = beloved/a beloved person  
> i ashaya du = i love you  
> tal-kam = dear  
> taluhk nash-veh k’dular = i cherish thee


End file.
